Category Archives: Conversation Circles

The Third Place

If our first place is our home and the people we live with and the second place is the workplace where some of us spend most of our time, where is our third place? The original concept of the third place has been attributed to Ray Oldenburg who shared his research on the 1989 edition of The Great Good Place. These third places are our social spaces where we spend time away from home and work. In Oldenberg’s original research, third places were physical spaces where people met to socialize, make friends, and build relationships such as Rotary Clubs, church communities, libraries, parks, cafés and bars, among other friendly places. More recently, virtual spaces such as social media and live video conferencing platforms have taken the place of many of these physical places.

I am grateful to the members of my Renaissance Conversation Circle for the inspiration for this blog post. We are small group, now into our fourth year, meeting twice a month on Zoom. Some members attend nearly every session, others join when they can; new members are welcomed and, if they find a home in our circle, become regular participants. We select a topic and someone to be the conversation starter. Sessions are hosted and self-managed with some basic agreements rather than actively facilitated. We create space for deep conversations, exploring topics of common interest, sharing wisdom and experience, and supporting each other on journeys of collaboration and transformation.

I also host themed conversation circles and mastermind groups. Six-month programs of twelve 75-minute sessions allow a deep dive into the chapters of our Midlife, New Life book. An ongoing Conscious Leadership Mastermind group has an international flavor, and we explore the different principles and practices of conscious leadership in organizations and the wider world. The focus of these discussion groups is on inquiry and shared experiences rather than advising or advocating for personal strongly held positions and are shaped by relationships that are neither invasive nor evasive. Each circle serves as a special community, fostering wonderful interactions and building connections that often develop into lasting friendships with people we may never meet in person.

These virtual third places are for deep conversations – places for listening, learning, sharing, and improving our social wellness. If you are looking for connection and community, and these circles have piqued your interest, send me an email at info@2young2retire.com. Do yourself a favor and find a new third place today.

Article also posted at: https://drpaulward.com/blog/

Rituals and Routines

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Rituals was the theme for one of our recent conscious conversation circles on Zoom. Our conversation starter reminded us about the celebratory rituals we often associate with the religious ceremonies for weddings, births, and deaths, or ancient sacred ceremonies such as rites of passage, dedications, atonement and purification, oaths of allegiance, coronations, presidential inaugurations, and much more. Also, the personal preparatory rituals relating to our waking practices, bedtime practices, and so much more.

For our annual family holiday, we rent a big house for children, grandchildren and other family members to gather and spend a week together as a family. Although we create a relaxed atmosphere with very few rules, we require everyone to gather together for dinner each evening to enjoy the meal prepared by the family members responsible for that evening’s meal. One of our rituals is the moment before we begin eating where one of the children read words of gratitude for this precious family time, the meal and all those involved in its preparation, and to express hope for all members of the human family around the world. The children compete to be the day’s reader and all take their turn during the week.

Routines are not the same as rituals. Routines are regularly repeated actions like brushing teeth or eating dinner, whereas rituals often embrace a specific sense of meaning or purpose, and clearly establish valued membership of a group or circle. Gratitude, kindness, and generosity are often part of the ritual, demonstrating the caring and compassionate nature of those involved. Convening our conversation circles involves rituals and agreements that allow for deep meaningful conversations. If you would like to learn more about experiencing the rituals in our conversation circles, please reach out via the contact page on this web site.

Originally published on the Dr. Paul Ward Blog.

Finding Your Voice

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Finding Your Voice was one of many themes we explored in our conversation circles this year. In these conversation circles, we discussed our physical voice, the outer voice we use for speaking, singing, and perhaps chanting; our inner voice, the internal monologue in our head that provides the words and images that reflect our thoughts and imaginings; and our figurative voice, our authentic voice, what we believe and what we truly stand for, the voice that is manifesting in our speaking and writing.

Thinking about the singing voice brings to mind my mother. As a teenager, long before I was born, she sang in the church choir. At home, while I was growing up, she was always singing. Singing while cooking or doing the dishes, or at anytime while working around the house or in the garden. She had a beautiful voice. I wonder now why we never recorded her singing. A missed opportunity!

As we come to the end of the year, many of us take time to reflect, celebrating our accomplishments, noting what went well and maybe what didn’t go as planned, thinking about what we learned, remembering the people who came into our lives and those who departed. Then, looking forward to the new year, thinking about our aspirations and setting intentions.

As readers of my blog posts may know, I select and share my word of the year. A word that represents my area of focus, a touchstone for my thinking, writing, and speaking in the year ahead. Emergence, surrender, and hope were the words of recent years. I am now in the process of selecting my word for the upcoming year, a word that may guide the finding of my voice, and inspire responsible action. I am reflecting on the following questions and invite us all to do the same: What do we stand for? Who will we be and how will we show up in the world? How will we find and use our individual voice and our collective voices in the coming year? I wish you success with finding your voice.

Originally published on the Dr. Paul Ward Blog.